


On Probation

by devilinthedetails



Category: PIERCE Tamora - Works, Tortall - Tamora Pierce
Genre: Anger, Betrayal, Friendship, Gen, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Politics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-22
Updated: 2018-12-22
Packaged: 2019-09-24 22:41:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17109515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/devilinthedetails/pseuds/devilinthedetails
Summary: Alanna wrestles with Jon's decision to allow Keladry of Mindelan to be put on probation.





	On Probation

**Author's Note:**

  * For [The_Big_Wee_Hag](https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Big_Wee_Hag/gifts).



> Written for the Wishing Tree event at Goldenlake.

On Probation

“If you’ve come on Jon’s behalf to try to talk me out of my temper, you can save your breath and leave now.” Alanna didn’t look up from throwing clothes into her saddlebags when Gary appeared in her doorway. If she turned her face up to his, he would see the tears of mingled hurt and anger in her eyes and might misinterpret them as a sign of weakness, a hope that she might be convinced to reconcile with her king. 

“I haven’t come on Jon’s behalf.” Gary stepped into the room, and Alanna sensed he was an inch away from resting a hand upon her shoulder before dropping it in uncertainty about how she would respond to this gesture in her outrage. “I’ve come on yours, Alanna.” 

Alanna snorted dubiously at this. After a heated argument with her, Jon would often dispatch Gary to calm her down—to be the placating peacemaker between them. In the past, it had almost always worked, but this time Alanna was determined that it wouldn’t. Jon had allowed Lord Wyldon to drag her entire legacy through the mud—to threaten everything she had fought tooth and nail to achieve for women in Tortall by becoming the first female knight in centuries—when he agreed that Keladry of Mindelan might be put on a year’s probation with Lord Wyldon as sole judge of whether she could remain in training beyond that. As far as Alanna was concerned, that meant Jon was on probation with her until Keladry of Mindelan was finished with hers. 

“You doubt me?” Gary sounded stung. “When have I ever been disloyal to you? I was your first friend in the palace, remember?” 

Alanna did remember. Jon had been her best friend—and sometimes more than that—-during knighthood training, but Gary had been her first one, the one to show her around the palace, take her into the Corus markets where she had met George, and helped her through assignments that would have left her hopelessly scratching her head. She would have given up a week into page training without Gary’s cheerful support and fierce wit. 

Still Alanna knew that Gary and Jon were, as George would say, thick as thieves. They were, after all, cousins raised to be almost brothers, and they spent their days with their heads pressed together, discussing politics in ways Alanna could never have fathomed without risking a severe headache. 

“You’re the king’s cousin and Prime Minister.” Alanna’s hand trembled as she tossed a shirt into her saddlebag. “I can’t blame you if your first loyalty is to him.” 

“I know you’re hurt, Alanna.” Gary put a hand on her shaking shoulder. 

“Of course I’m hurt,” snapped Alanna. She should have jerked away from Gary’s touch, but she didn’t. It would only have made her feel more alone than she already did. “Jon just dumped cow manure over my whole legacy, everything I ever wanted to accomplish for women warriors, but that shouldn’t be a surprise since he undermined the cause of female knights last year when he discouraged Kally from training as one.” 

“Kally made her own choice not to train as a page.” Gary’s words were too smooth and swift to be completely credible. 

“She only made the choice not to train as a page because Jon persuaded her that she shouldn’t.” Alanna’s jaw clenched so tightly it pained her, and she didn’t know why she had picked this moment to rip the bandage off a raw, festering wound that refused to heal. “He can persuade a little girl not to train as a page, but he can’t convince a man so stiff he creaks with every move not to put a girl page on probation.” 

“There are politics to consider.” Gary sighed, and Alanna scowled, thinking that the last thing she wanted to consider were the political necessities that demanded Keladry of Mindelan be placed on probation instead of treated fairly by a king who wasn’t half so progressive as he believed he was. “We’re all making great changes in the realm, but if we push too far and too fast with our reforms, everything we’ve accomplished could unravel before our unbelieving eyes. We have to compromise with conservatives sometimes or we’ll be undone and so will the country. Be reasonable, not bitter.” 

“I don’t want to be reasonable, Gary.” Alanna gritted her teeth, resentful beyond rationality that Jon and Gary would deem the cause of female knighthood an appropriate one to be sacrificed on the altar of compromise with conservatives. “You know who can afford to be reasonable about problems? Those who aren’t impacted by them.” 

“Jon and I spend our days trying to solve problems for the realm.” There was a sharp edge to Gary’s tone that should have warned Alanna that she had finally gone too far in her fury. “Please don’t act as if we’re unaffected by them.” 

“You try to solve problems from your peaceful, privileged perch above them in the palace.” Alanna waved a dismissive palm. “That’s not the same as being impacted by them, which you would realize if you were truly impacted by them.” 

“Jon mentioned you would be leaving court for awhile.” Gary turned away from her, striding toward the door. 

“I will be, and I plan to be gone for at least a year.” Alanna hoped by the Goddess that Jon would have removed his stubborn head from his hindquarters by then. 

“Perhaps that’s wisest since you can’t be reasonable about this. Gods go with you on your journey, Alanna.” Gary left, shutting the door firmly between them. 

The next day, Alanna rode out of Corus at dawn and didn’t stop until she came to Raoul’s camp with the Own. All she could think as her horse’s hooves pounded the dusty road was how Raoul would understand how betrayed she felt by Jon because Raoul was a warrior like her who preferred to hold himself apart from the petty politics that dominated Jon’s and Gary’s lives. 

When she reached the camp, she burst into Raoul’s tent. He swept her into a bear hug that crushed her ribcage, and something inside her heart shattered at the wildness of his affection for her. Sobbing into his shoulder, she explained, “A girl wants to train as a page, and Jon’s going to allow her to be put on a year’s probation after which she could be sent home with her tail between her legs on Lord Wyldon’s whim.” 

“If this girl’s anything like you, she’ll be too tenacious to be sent home with her tail between her legs after a year.” Raoul patted her back. 

“That makes me feel a bit better.” Alanna mopped her eyes with the cuff of her sleeve. “Gary tried to make me feel a bit better…” 

“But he failed dismally,” finished Raoul. 

“How did you know?” Alanna felt her lips crack into the tremulous beginning of what might be coaxed into a smile. 

“If he’d succeeded, you wouldn’t have sought me out,” pointed out Raoul, and Alanna’s mouth curved into a wobbly grin. 

“What would I do without you?” she asked, nudging him. 

“Be all the more terrifying in your temper,” Raoul teased. 

“I already terrify king and country.” Alanna gave a short bark of laughter that left her dizzy with the power of her long friendship with Raoul. She prayed to the Goddess that Keladry of Mindelan would find as faithful friends in the pages’ wing as she had so many years ago.


End file.
